Tuesday, December 22, 2009


Me and my son
(August 13, 2004, Uralsk, Kazakhstan)
Photo by my wife

You wanna destroy the world? Do something loving.

No, really.

The world as it was up until that point will cease to exist. It will be replaced with something entirely new and amazing.

I loved someone once (among other times). He didn't like me very much the first day, but I was actually prepared for that. The photo you see above was taken the second day, when the two of us finally made eye contact and more or less agreed to put up with each other for the duration.

The result five years down the road is a dynamic, constant, mutual exchange of devotion and growth, frustration and resolution, communication and joy. I'm not sure which one of us has been transformed by it more. Fatherhood is a fascinating beast. Sure, Alex is not the little boy he was when we adopted him. But then again, I'm not the man I was when I landed in Kazakhstan to meet him. The world I knew ceased to exist that day.

Love changes everything. It is a radical, transforming, impenetrable, monolithic, violent, dangerous, unpredictable, radioactive fire of a billion suns. You get a choice: either learn to direct it well as it destroys what is wrong, or you will unintentionally destroy others by it, or you will be destroyed by it.

This Christmas, how will your love destroy the old world? I wonder what the new one that replaces it will look like.

You have your assignment. Go!

This post is now part of Bridget Chumbley's
One Word at a Time Blog Carnival: Love
December 28, 2009

It is continued in part two...